Doubting your abilities is not only costing you in sales & results BUT is also one of the fastest ways to limit your success, happiness and stall your progress within your career.
You can’t experience sustainable success & lead with purpose and intention if you are constantly questioning your abilities.
No matter what you do – Your focus, motivation and performance will never reach the level you desire when all you do is 2nd guess your actions, choices & ideas.
Nothing will change unless you change how you view yourself first!
So many people make the mistake of searching for the answers, solutions and praise through external solutions – which is just backwards!
When you stop searching externally. And start looking at yourself from within. You identify the REAL REASON why you struggle to trust in yourself enough to create sustainable growth in your performance.
You gain insights into your personal limits. You break down old patterns. And you identify exactly what needs to change – in order to create the success and performance you want.
Which is why I want to share with you 3 tips that can kick start the breakdown on self doubt and take the pressure off so you can take a breath and reconnect with your inner power & regroup and align with your purpose, impact and results:
#1: STOP Doubting Your Abilities- You are Awesome!
We all feel Doubt at some point in our lives.
It doesn’t matter who you are or what you do. We all go through stages when we doubt others or ourselves.
BUT it is what you do in that moment that determines the outcomes.
Doubts kicks in when you’re pushing yourself. When you’re overwhelmed. When you’re tired. When everything just feels too much. You lose that trust – that belief and suddenly you 2nd guess everything.
“I’ll never be as good as…everything just feels hard…I never get any luck, what if it doesn’t work…. I tried that before…good things don’t happen to me, people will judge me, there is no way I can do that….
- You worry about letting yourself or others down
- You worry you might make a mistake and get judged
- You worry you might fail!
Suddenly you stop trusting yourselves and others. You procrastinate and wait for the right time. Make excuses as to why you can or can’t do things.
You hold back.
Your dream job has just been advertised. The one you’ve been waiting for. BUT suddenly you don’t feel ready. Instead of getting excited. You focus on the one thing you can’t do. You come up with a million and one excuses as to why it’s not the right time. And then to top it off start thinking about all the other people who would be better than you in the job.
You’ve just been asked to present at conference – something you have wanted to do for ages BUT, BUT, BUT every time you think about it your heart races. Your palms get sweaty. You picture people laughing at you – thinking’ who does she think she is – or why should I listen to her’. And straight away you don’t want to do it anymore!
The truth is regardless of what the opportunity is. Before you get the chance to say yes, you’ve talked yourself out of it.
BUT, No one situation is the same, you are not the same person you were yesterday, let alone a few years ago and more importantly failure DOESN’T EXIST!
The only time you fail is when you Quit. Everything is feedback! Opportunities for you to see what is working and what isn’t.
Without this feedback you can’t grow. If something doesn’t work –you fix it!
If something works well you can run with it, expand it and transfer it into other areas of your life!
Challenge yourself: Next time you question your abilities, or 2nd guess your choices take the time to understand the fear behind the story and let it go
When you’re feeling fearful you limit yourself. You resort back to old habits and thought patterns.
Try writing down anything negative that’s causing you to feel negative- out of flow – doubtful etc.
- This could be anything from a bad day.
- A comment someone said.
- An argument.
- Or just a total lack of confidence.
The sooner you can get in out of your head and on to paper you can create space and allow you to think more clearly and let it go so it stops affecting your productivity, confidence and Mindset.
Just write whatever comes up and don’t worry about it making sense; the aim is to just get everything out!
Once you have written the list – rip it up and throw it away.
This creates space. Gets everything out of your head. And allows you to move on.
#2 STOP Being an arsehole to yourself!
Stop being an arsehole to yourself!!!
When you don’t feel good enough. Or you’re questioning your abilities. The easiest person to take your frustration out on is yourself!!
Why did you just do that, what am idiot, I can’t believe you did that, you aren’t are good as the others, no one will take you seriously…
We’ve all done it – let rip at ourselves for saying the wrong thing. Taking the wrong turn. Letting someone or yourself down. Not doing something as well as we wanted.
Our natural response is to call ourselves stupid. An idiot. Or something worse! And then go over it relentlessly in our head – just to wind ourselves up even more!
The real kicker is that often you don’t even know you are doing it. OR we think it is just normal behavior!!
Would you speak to others in the same way? Probably not!
Why not? You wouldn’t want to hurt them. Upset them. And make them feel bad, right?
So why do you do it to yourself?
When you go on a rant – you break down your defenses. You lower your energy. And you feel pretty inadequate!!!
How would it feel to flip it, reframe it and start to give yourself a boost?
I love this saying, as it’s so true “Energy follows thought” or in simple terms – what you think about becomes your reality!!!!……..
When you beat yourself up. You feel pretty low. And everything around you feels pretty grim too. You focus on what’s not gone well. How bad you feel. And what an idiot you are.
As a result, everything you do mirrors this too.
Equally when you show compassion, kindness and focus on what you want instead. You feel excited. Energized. And uplifted. As a result, everything you do mirrors that too!
The truth is we will all make mistakes – no one is perfect! So give yourself a break…
- You ARE Enough
- We all make mistakes
- Criticising yourself will just make you feel like shit
- Punishing yourself won’t help either!
- Be Nice. Be Kind.
- No one is immune from f**king up!!!
Take the pressure off and use the learning’s from your mistakes to help you come back stronger and better.
#3: REDUCE Overwhelm
Announcement: Rome wasn’t built in a day!!
We all put ourselves under so much pressure to either be everything to everyone or to get everything they need to get done yesterday!!
BUT lets be honest, this isn’t sustainable!
When you’re overwhelmed everything just feels so BIG!
You can’t think straight. Your head’s spinning. You feel anxious, short tempered and irritable.
You’ve got a million and one things to do. And yet every time you try and do something your mind gets foggy – You can’t see the wood through the trees!
You flit between feeling totally ‘on it’ and excited one minute to questioning everything and doubting your abilities the next!
So I want you to STOP, BREATHE and work backwards!
You don’t need to have all the answers, all the actions in place right now.
All you need to do is keep putting one foot in front of the other. Break everything down. And get clear on what needs to happen first!
- What do you need to do before anything else to get started?
- What one thing do I need to achieve by the end of the week?
- Who can help me?
- What can I let go off?
- How can I make this fun?
When you are clear on this – break everything down into really small steps. So you know exactly what you need to do for the next few days. AND remember you don’t have to do it all on your own, ask for help.
The biggest lesson I’ve learnt however is consistency. It’s what you do next that will make the difference.
Truth is you can’t expect to make a difference by doing something once.
You wouldn’t expect to run a marathon from just one training session right? Well it’s the same with your Mindset. You need to keep going. To build yourself up. And to challenge yourself to keep making changes.
Then it gets really real!
So, if you are keen to keep going and know your future self will love you for it – Sign up for my FREE 4 Day Manage Your Mind Challenge!
Specially designed for everyone who is ready to drop the BS act and wholeheartedly own your power by fully trusting in yourself, your choices and your abilities – so you can unapologetically and authentically embrace your uniqueness and create new levels of success and happiness in ALL areas of your life.
Here is how it works
- Starting Monday 9th Nov I will be coming LIVE for 4 days to share with you some transformational training and help you to dive in internally and start understanding what YOU are doing to create these limits..
Saving you heaps of time and stress looking for the answers in all the wrong external places.
Because the answers you are looking for are within you.
CLICK to the Link below to SIGN UP TODAY